December 23rd marked 5 years since I had my lap band surgery. It amazes me that it's only been 5 years; my life has changed so much, it's hardly recognizable from what it was before my surgery. I tell people that it changed my life, and it's true. Not only did it help me lose half of my body weight (before I got pregnant) and therefore reduce my chances of heart problems, diabetes, and other weight-related illnesses, but it saved me from a life of loneliness and self-loathing.
Before the lap band, I weighed 350 pounds. For years, I had hovered around 300, but in 2008 I had gained over 40 pounds through lack of exercise and a really bad diet which was exacerbated by my job. I traveled around Utah and surrounding states providing hearing tests to the employees of various companies. It was fun and I enjoyed it, but I ate while I drove to stay awake and while in the different locales, I didn't eat well. At home, I was too tired to cook and ate out more often than I ever had before - also because eating out gets addicting.
I had always been a pretty social person with more confidence than one might suspect from a gal who weighed 300 pounds, but that was slowly changing. I found myself less inclined to want to be around other people, even my family and closest friends. I was uncomfortable, physically and emotionally, almost all the time. I never really considered suicide but I often wished for an end of the pain but all I could see was a lifetime of being morbidly obese and getting fatter and fatter.
Luckily, my stepmom (and I'm sure others) saw the change in me. She knew a woman who had lost 60 pounds after having lap band surgery, so Paula had my dad offer to help me pay for it if I wanted to have the surgery. Paula told me later that she was afraid I had stopped enjoying life and it made her so sad. I could never have afforded to pay for the surgery myself and I didn't have insurance, so I owe Dad and Paula a debt that goes beyond the money they gave me for the lap band.
Had I not had the lap band, I probably never would have lost enough weight to feel comfortable signing up for an online dating site (after being goaded to do so by a friend), would never have met Steve, so wouldn't be married to the most perfect man for me and wouldn't be mom to the most adorable boy in the world, Matt.
In ways, it doesn't seem like it's been only 5 years since I had the lap band surgery. I can barely remember what it felt like to be so overweight and can hardly recognize myself when I see pictures of me from back then. Haven't I always looked like I do now? :) Except for that last year or so, I pictured myself looking like I do now and was always surprised to see evidence that I didn't. I finally feel like I am who I always thought I was. I can be my true self without hiding behind or from the fat. I'm just me and I'm so very happy!
Here's to another 5 years... and many, many more after that!
Before the lap band, I weighed 350 pounds. For years, I had hovered around 300, but in 2008 I had gained over 40 pounds through lack of exercise and a really bad diet which was exacerbated by my job. I traveled around Utah and surrounding states providing hearing tests to the employees of various companies. It was fun and I enjoyed it, but I ate while I drove to stay awake and while in the different locales, I didn't eat well. At home, I was too tired to cook and ate out more often than I ever had before - also because eating out gets addicting.
I had always been a pretty social person with more confidence than one might suspect from a gal who weighed 300 pounds, but that was slowly changing. I found myself less inclined to want to be around other people, even my family and closest friends. I was uncomfortable, physically and emotionally, almost all the time. I never really considered suicide but I often wished for an end of the pain but all I could see was a lifetime of being morbidly obese and getting fatter and fatter.
Luckily, my stepmom (and I'm sure others) saw the change in me. She knew a woman who had lost 60 pounds after having lap band surgery, so Paula had my dad offer to help me pay for it if I wanted to have the surgery. Paula told me later that she was afraid I had stopped enjoying life and it made her so sad. I could never have afforded to pay for the surgery myself and I didn't have insurance, so I owe Dad and Paula a debt that goes beyond the money they gave me for the lap band.
Had I not had the lap band, I probably never would have lost enough weight to feel comfortable signing up for an online dating site (after being goaded to do so by a friend), would never have met Steve, so wouldn't be married to the most perfect man for me and wouldn't be mom to the most adorable boy in the world, Matt.
In ways, it doesn't seem like it's been only 5 years since I had the lap band surgery. I can barely remember what it felt like to be so overweight and can hardly recognize myself when I see pictures of me from back then. Haven't I always looked like I do now? :) Except for that last year or so, I pictured myself looking like I do now and was always surprised to see evidence that I didn't. I finally feel like I am who I always thought I was. I can be my true self without hiding behind or from the fat. I'm just me and I'm so very happy!
Here's to another 5 years... and many, many more after that!